What Makes Filipino Woman Happy?

What do women want? Freud asked the question nearly 100 years ago and confessed that his "thirty years of research into the feminine soul" left him unable to answer one great question: "What does a woman want?"

This question definitely elicits intense interest among us. That is why statistics is also trying to find answers to this question. Last week, I came across this very interesting article entitled “What makes Women Happy?” by Dr. Romulo A. Virola, Secretary General of the National Statistical Coordination Board (NSCB).

Dr. Virola reported that women in the Philippines rank food a lot higher than their sex life among the main things that make them happy based on the recent NSCB survey. The poll also concluded that, both Filipino men and women ranked family, health and religion in that order as the three most important things that made them happy.

Pinay respondents, however, put food in fifth place, just ahead of work. Love life came 10th and and sex life at 18th, just one rank above the bottom.

For the Pinoy Machos, love life figured in 6th place and sex life 10th, with food at 9th. So you see ladies? Sex is not the only thing occupying Pinoy’s mind – at least food ranked before sex. Ha ha. 

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"This is easy to trivialise, but the unmet expectations for love and sex by either partner can surely lead to problems, and must be managed properly and professionally," Virola wrote on the NSCB website.

Naturally, for the poor Filipinos, men ranked their sex, love lives and food at the top while women said family, love life and food were top of their lists.

I’m not a fan of surveys, especially if you’re measuring happiness because we know that different individuals have different definitions and sources of happiness. Maybe they should include sabong, because it makes my Tatay very happy, or videoke singing because we all love to sing.

For the most part of, the results are obvious. These are literal and basic requirements for human needs and happiness – which reminds me of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

How about you, what makes you happy?

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Source: Virola, Romulo A. "What Makes Women Happy?"

The Wooden Bowl

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year-old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.

The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. "We must do something about father,'" said the son. "I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor."

So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.

When the family glanced in Grandfather' s direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.

The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, "What are you making?"

Just as sweetly, the boy responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.

The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.

That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.

Filipino Catholics in the Eyes of Foreigners

Here's something very positive written by a foreigner named Steve Ray, about Filipinos. Steve Ray authored many best-selling books, among which are, Crossing The Tiber (his conversion story), Upon This Rock (on the papacy), and just recently John's Gospel (a comprehensive bible study guide and commentary).

STEVE RAY'S OPEN LETTER TO THE FILIPINO CATHOLICS:

We stepped into the church and it was old and a bit dark. Mass had just begun and we sat toward the front. We didn't know what to expect here in Istanbul , Turkey. I guess we expected it to be a sombre Mass but quiet and sombre it was not - I thought I heard angels joyously singing behind me.

The voices were rich, melodic and beautiful. What I discovered as I spun around to look did not surprise me because I had seen and heard the same thing in other churches around the world. It was not a choir of angels with feathered wings and halos but a group of delightful Filipino Catholics with smiles of delight and joy on their faces as they worshiped God and sang His praises. I had seen this many times before in Rome , in Israel ,in the United States and other countries.

Filipinos have special traits and they are beautifully expressed as I gazed at the happy throng giving thanks to God. What are the special traits which characterize these happy people? I will share a few that I have noticed- personal observations- as I have travelled around the world, including visits to the Philippines

FIRST, there is a sense of community, of family. These Filipino Christians did not sit apart from each other in different isles. They sat together, closely. They didn't just sing quietly, mumbling, or simply mouthing the words. No, they raised their voices in harmony together as though they enjoyed the sense of unity and communion among them. They are family even if they are not related.

SECOND, they have an inner peace and joy which is rare in the world today. When most of the world's citizens are worried and fretful, I have found Filipinos to have joy and peace - a deep sense of God's love that over shadows them. They have problems too, and many in the Philippines have less material goods than others in the world, yet there is still a sense of happy trust in God and love of neighbour.

THIRD, there is a love for God and for his Son Jesus that is almost synonymous with the word Filipino. There is also something that Filipinos are famous for around the world - their love for the Blessed Mother. Among the many Filipinos I have met, the affectionate title for Mary I always hear from their lips is "Mama Mary." For these gentle folks Mary is not just a theological idea, a historical person, or a statue in a church - Mary is the mother of their Lord and their mother as well, their "mama."

The Philippines is a Catholic nation-the only such nation in Asia –and this wonderful country exports missionaries around the world. They are not hired to be missionaries, not official workers of the church. No, they are workers and educators, doctors, nurses and housekeepers that go to other lands and travel to the far reaches of the earth, and everywhere they go they take the joyous gospel of Jesus with them. They make a sombre Mass joyful when they burst into song. They convict the pagan of sin as they always keep the love of Jesus and the Eucharist central in their lives.

My hope and prayer, while I am here in the Philippines sharing my conversion story from Baptist Protestant to Roman Catholic, is that the Filipino people will continue to keep these precious qualities. I pray that they will continue loving their families, loving the Catholic Church, reading the Bible, loving Jesus, His Mother and the Eucharist.

As many other religions and sects try to persuade them to leave the Church, may God give the wisdom to defend the Catholic faith. As the world tempts them to sin and seek only money and fame and power, may God grant them the serenity to always remember that obedience to Christ and love for God is far more important than all the riches the world can offer.

May the wonderful Filipino people continue to be a light of the Gospel to the whole world!

Be a proud Filipino.